Dialogue

Devan: So, I know we haven’t been on the best terms lately...

Marni:  That’s true.

Devan:  ...but you’ve known me longer than anyone else, and you were there from the beginning of me and Jason’s relationship.

Marni:  What’s going on?

Devan:  It seems, like, with me and Jason, I don’t know what’s going on, but we don’t do any of the things we used to do together anymore.

Marni:  So, what did you use to do?

Devan:  We used to…you know, just watch the sunset and we’d just sit in silence. We didn’t even need to talk, we just had this understanding with each other. Now when we sit in silence it’s not like that unspoken understanding, it’s kind of an awkward, uncomfortable silence, you know?

Marni:  Huh. That doesn’t sound good, yeah.

Devan:  It’s almost like we know each other less now instead of more. And you know, he used to bring me presents all the time, and I can’t even remember the last time. He completely missed our anniversary. He didn’t get me anything. On my birthday he, like, stopped at Safeway on his way home and bought some $5 flowers, you know?

Marni:  So did he used to give you lots of fresh flowers and things like that, toys and fun gifts?

Devan:  Yeah, he used to give me, like, cute little toys… He doesn’t do any of those things anymore.

Marni:  Huh.

Devan:  Do you think that we’re just past the honeymoon phase and that this is normal? Or do you think that we aren’t going to work? Do you think that there’s a way to fix this and to salvage things?

Marni:  Yeah, absolutely! I mean, I don’t think this spells disaster for your relationship. But I think it sounds like you’re kind of craving the way things used to be, the little things that he did for you, so I would just bring it up to him. Talk to him about it. Say “you know I loved it when we used to do this, now we’re not really doing that, so let’s try to bring back some of those things that I liked.”

Devan:  Yeah, maybe we can start planning, like, date night or something romantic.

Marni:  There you go.

Devan:  I just don’t want the romance to die.

Marni:  No, no one does. No one does.
Discussion

Devan is worried because her boyfriend Jason forgot their anniversary. He never buys her presents anymore like he used to. She is worried that the romance is gone and their relationship will fail.

Marni suggests that she talk to Jason about their relationship. She thinks if they try, they can keep the romance alive and things can be like they used to be.

Have you ever had a relationship that changed over time? What did you used to do together, and what do you do now?
Grammar Point

Used to Do vs. Be Used to

Devan says that she and Jason no longer do the things they used to do together. We use used to + verb to talk about things we did regularly or habitually in the past and do not do now. For example, Jason used to give Devan presents. And Jason and Devan used to watch the sunset together. Now they no longer do these things.

It’s easy to confuse used to do with be used to, but they mean very different things. If you are used to something, you are accustomed to it. It is normal or usual for you. Be used to is always followed by a noun or gerund (verb ending in “ing”). For example, “I am used to being alone,” or “She is used to hot weather.”

Which is correct, “Devan and Jason are used to spend more time together” or “Devan and Jason used to spend more time together”?
Quiz

   1.

      Devan and Jason used to ____.
          * watch the sunset
          * play tennis
          * read poetry
          * bake cookies
          * All of these.
   2.

      What did Jason forget?
          * Devan’s name.
          * Devan’s birthday.
          * His anniversary with Devan.
          * None of these.
   3.

      Marni suggests that Devan…
          * ...talk to Jason.
          * ...break up with Jason.
          * ...do something nice for Jason.
          * ...hope things get better.
   4.

      I __ study hard, but lately I have been slacking off.
          * am used to
          * used to do
          * was used to
          * used to
   5.

      The snow doesn’t bother Christy because she _ it.